Parents Giving Money at Weddings: A Practical Guide

Giving cash at a wedding feels simple, but many parents worry about how to do it right. Should you write a check, use an envelope, or go digital? How much is polite to give? This guide answers those questions so you can hand over your gift with confidence.

First, remember that cash is a gift, not a payment. It’s meant to help the couple start their life together, not replace any part of the ceremony costs. Treat it like any other present: wrap it nicely, include a heartfelt note, and give it at the right moment.

How Much Should Parents Give?

There’s no one‑size‑fits‑all number, but most families base the amount on two things: their own budget and the couple’s expected expenses. A common rule of thumb for parents is to give an amount that equals the cost of a decent suit or dress, plus a little extra for fun. In the UK, that usually lands between £300 and £600. If you’re comfortable spending more, go ahead – the couple will appreciate the thought.

Another easy way to decide is to look at the total wedding budget. Some couples ask for a contribution to a specific fund (like a honeymoon or house deposit). If the couple shares that information, match your gift to the level they’ve suggested. Otherwise, a safe bet is £200‑£500, adjusting up or down based on your finances.

Presentation Tips That Make Cash Feel Thoughtful

Plain envelopes can feel bland. Try these simple ideas to add a personal touch without spending much:

• Use a decorative card or small box and slip the cash inside.
• Write a sincere note explaining why you chose to give money – perhaps you want to help with the honeymoon or first home.
• If you’re tech‑savvy, set up a digital cash gift using a service like PayPal or a wedding registry cash fund, then print the confirmation and place it in a card.

Whatever you choose, make sure the presentation matches the tone of the wedding. A rustic barn wedding might call for a kraft paper envelope, while a formal ballroom event works well with a glossy card.

Timing matters, too. Hand the gift to the couple after they’re officially introduced as husband and wife, or give it to a trusted family member who can deliver it later. Avoid handing it over during the ceremony – that can be distracting.

Common Etiquette Questions Answered

Do I need to give cash if I’ve already helped with wedding planning? Yes. Your planning help is a separate contribution. Money helps the couple with post‑wedding expenses, like setting up a home.

Should I give cash if the couple has a registry? If the registry includes a cash fund, feel free to contribute directly. If not, cash is still welcome – just mention it in a note.

Will the couple feel uncomfortable? Most modern couples expect cash gifts and appreciate the flexibility. The key is to give it with a warm message, not as a transaction.

Finally, remember that the sentiment behind the gift matters most. Parents who give money are showing support for their child’s new chapter. By following these simple guidelines, you’ll give a gift that feels both generous and thoughtful, leaving the couple grateful and ready to celebrate.